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View Full Version : The best grilled cheese you will ever have!


Dave Siegel
April 6, 2004, 06:08 PM
Sorry Atkisn folks...

2 slices of white wonderbread
1 square of orange American cheese
2 strips of bacon
Hellman's Mayo
garlic salt (optional)

DON'T spread the butter on the bread. Rather, melt it in a non-stick pan until it foams. Put both pieces of bread in side to side, essentially frying it to keep crispy. One one piece of bread put the cheese, the other a smear of mayo with the bacon. After a minute or two combine pieces, flip and press until both sides are dark golden brown. Sprinkle with optional garlic salt and enjoy!

Jeff Sconce
April 6, 2004, 07:27 PM
Actually, they have Atkins approved bread now. A fact which makes my head hurt really, really bad.

Ben Moser
April 6, 2004, 07:30 PM
I love that the world never budged for vegetarians, but is rolling over and playing dead for atkins. Hilarious. Eat it, vegitarians. You may as well, since there's nothing else on the menu for you.

Jeff Sconce
April 6, 2004, 09:26 PM
Hey, I take offense! Delicious offense!

That's reality for ya. Morals be damned, but when I can't fit into a size X anymore, to hell with the white devil that is white bread. Style over substance, ect.

EthanK
April 6, 2004, 10:22 PM
Sorry Dave, you've lost this round of KEEPING PASSOVER.

http://www.columbia.edu/cu/thefed/v2/archives/18/18.3/images/rabbi.jpg
By eating leavened bread, bacon (pork) and meat with milk, you have officially lost Passover. Do not pass Go, do not collect gelt.

Lisa P
April 6, 2004, 10:27 PM
Ahh, but as a meatless meal, it is suitable for Fridays during Lent. Wanna' turn Catholic, Dave? I did. It's easy.

ilaughatme
April 6, 2004, 10:29 PM
Lisa, it has bacon. How is bacon meatless?

Lisa P
April 6, 2004, 10:31 PM
Oh, shit. I wasn't paying attention. And I'm not really a very good Catholic.

Dave Siegel
April 6, 2004, 10:33 PM
Ethan, hillarious.

That being said...kosher rules make perfectly good sense.......if you're living as a nomad in the middle of the desolate Negev wastelands in Judea and don't have any refridgeration.

As for the no leavened bread during passover, that actually has its roots in an annual spring cleaning ritual that predates the actual exodus story by hundreds of years, so I don't really sweat it.

Lisa P
April 6, 2004, 10:37 PM
Dave, can you explain away the no bacon on Fridays during Lent? Because if you can, I will love you forever.

PT
April 6, 2004, 10:38 PM
What's Passover?

Ben Moser
April 6, 2004, 10:38 PM
Dietary rules are for chumps.

Yay protestants!

EthanK
April 6, 2004, 10:40 PM
It's ok Dave. On Yom Kippur I ate a bacon cheeseburger. That's another 3-sins-in-one that I have going against me.

Dave Siegel
April 6, 2004, 10:42 PM
But if you contemplated on it and regreted doing it....then you're squeaky clean. Can't be the 'Kippur.

EthanK
April 6, 2004, 10:45 PM
afterwards it was more like "huh. that was probably really uncalled for, really showing off my lack of conviction." I guess that was repentence although it didn't cripple me with guilt for the day. I don't keep kosher. I don't practice much of anything and over the last four years I've done more with Christian history than with anything Jewish. My confirmation ceremony had a piano/harmonica jam session. I'm just not a very good Jew anymore.

PT
April 6, 2004, 10:50 PM
No Im serious, What is Passover?

Zack Bly
April 6, 2004, 10:53 PM
i miss passover. such a fun time of year. how joyous. how gay.

PT
April 6, 2004, 10:56 PM
Passover's a holiday?

WHAT IS IT!?

Dave Siegel
April 6, 2004, 10:56 PM
PT, Passover is a celebratory and symbolic meal that tells the story of the Jew's exodus from slavery in Egypt.

Harmonica and piano jam? Sounds like some bullshit hippie reform Judaism to me.

Lisa P
April 6, 2004, 10:59 PM
PT, Passover is a celebratory and symbolic meal that tells the story of the Jew's exodus from slavery in Egypt.

Harmonica and piano jam? Sounds like some bullshit hippie reform Judaism to me.Who cares about that shit, Dave? Give me an excuse to eat bacon on Friday, damn it!

PT
April 6, 2004, 11:02 PM
.........well that doesnt sound like much of a holiday to me.

Wouldnt you rather celebrate the memory of the Exodus by taking a long walk and helping the homeless? I would do it, but my god tells me to do things that are the exact opposite of good.

EthanK
April 6, 2004, 11:10 PM
Harmonica and piano jam? Sounds like some bullshit hippie reform Judaism to me.

You're right on there. The first thing the new rabbi did was bring in a popcorn machine. We've had goats in the synagogue during the high holy days to eat the sins of the congregation (actually a real practice of sin-eating afterwards the goat would either be killed or left to wander in the wilderness). It's reform all the way. So reform, in fact, that many of us lost the faith. I, for example, am a Nazi.

Ben Moser
April 6, 2004, 11:10 PM
Lisa, the greatest two commandments are to love the Lord and to love your neighbor.

Not a word about bacon. But if you're still not convinced, there's only one Friday left in Lent.

AND IT'S THE FRIDAY OF THE SERIES FINALE OF TONY'S PONY!!!

[/shameless plug]

Lisa P
April 6, 2004, 11:11 PM
Wouldnt you rather celebrate the memory of the Exodus by taking a long walk and helping the homeless?You know, we all know PT is insane, but this is kind of a neat idea. I'm not Jewish (already established, I guess) but it would be a great Lenten sacrifice, too. Are we able to organize ourselves enough to do something like this,next year maybe?

ilaughatme
April 6, 2004, 11:18 PM
BAD JEW JOKE COMING!!!!!!

Lisa, you can eat whatever you want during Lent. Hell, you weren't the one who killed him. The JEWS were.

Dave Siegel
April 6, 2004, 11:20 PM
Still trying to get blood out of that rock of a joke, huh Cece.

Lisa P
April 6, 2004, 11:22 PM
Lisa, the greatest two commandments are to love the Lord and to love your neighbor.

Not a word about bacon. But if you're still not convinced, there's only one Friday left in Lent.

AND IT'S THE FRIDAY OF THE SERIES FINALE OF TONY'S PONY!!!

[/shameless plug]Actually, Ben, I bet we could have some awesome discussion. I am a Catholic convert, but I was born North Carolina Scots-Irish Presbyterian, raised in the fine tradition of the military generic "Protestant Service", and born again and baptized a Southern Baptist as an adult before I ever found my way to the Ritual of Catholic Initiation for Adults (RCIA). All of that stuff has made its way into my peculiar brand of faith, and I like to think God kind of likes it.

Zack Bly
April 6, 2004, 11:25 PM
Gentilemen, gentilemen, enough with your jew-bashing! i think that judaism is DYN-O-(SE)-MITE!

ilaughatme
April 6, 2004, 11:25 PM
I wasn't the one who first said it actually. I can't remember who it was.

Anyway, to continue the actual religious part of the thread on grilled cheese, I'm a former Catholic!

I went to Catholic school from kindergarten to fourth grade. I did all the Catholic stuff until the end of high school. Right after confirmation, I quit. Now, I don't practice anything. I believe in God, though.

Lisa P
April 6, 2004, 11:27 PM
Gentilemen, gentilemen, enough with your jew-bashing! i think that judaism is DYN-O-(SE)-MITE!Zack, you have caused me physical pain. I believe that, in light of this suffering, I should receive dispensation to eat bacon on Friday. So shall it be written, so shall it be done.

Zack Bly
April 6, 2004, 11:27 PM
Right after confirmation, I quit.

you got confirmed? cool. what's your confirmation name?

ilaughatme
April 6, 2004, 11:29 PM
I believe it was Theresa. Which I plan to name a female child one day. I also have an adorable cousin by that name.

Zack Bly
April 6, 2004, 11:30 PM
wow, what do you know, i have a mother by that name.

ilaughatme
April 6, 2004, 11:33 PM
OH YEAH, I remember that Zack!

Scott and I have Jew Envy!

Jews are hot.


This is officially MY most retarded post ever.

PT
April 6, 2004, 11:36 PM
Is Lent a certain type of food?

EthanK
April 6, 2004, 11:37 PM
Don't have Jew envy. Remember, we are the people who gave you Joan Rivers, Jerry Seinfeld and Bruce Villanch.

PT
April 6, 2004, 11:38 PM
Oh LENT, I was thinking of hash browns with Apple Sauce on them. I had one once.

Lisa P
April 6, 2004, 11:43 PM
Is Lent a certain type of food?Lent is the 40 days before Easter. Jesus spent those 40 days fasting and praying in the desert before he entered Jerusalem, where he was tried and crucified, died and was buried. The third day he arose from the dead. He sits at the right hand of God... What? Sorry, I was spellbound for a moment. Anyway, some of us remember His sacrifice for us by making small sacrifices ourselves. It is not a requirement. It is a suggestion. I find it very valuable, spiritually. The small sacrifices remind me how much God loves me and how much Jesus suffered for me (yes, I really do believe all that stuff).

Dave Siegel
April 6, 2004, 11:47 PM
PT your "hash browns with applesauce on them" were potato latkes....a tasty hannukah treat.

Kit's Alter Ego
April 7, 2004, 12:53 AM
Is Lent a certain type of food?
Anyway, some of us remember His sacrifice for us by making small sacrifices ourselves.

I, for example, used to give up religion for Lent, until I found out this year that Sundays are "days off" from Lent in official church views. I felt like a fool for a moment, then realized I'd just been more pious than those bastards who took vacations from their sacrifices.

--Kit

Ben Moser
April 7, 2004, 06:36 AM
Ah yes, Sundays are days off. For those of you who ever counted the number of days between Ash Wednesday and Easter and came up with a number larger than 40, don't worry. The 40 days of Lent don't include the Sundays in Lent.

Lent is about the sacrifice, but every Sunday is it's own celebration of the resurrection.

But enough about that. Goats can eat your sin? Can this process somehow be used to feed the starving people of the world? Or is sin hard on the stomach?

(3 of the best pages ever because Dave wanted to share a grilled cheese recipe)

Dave Ries
April 7, 2004, 07:52 AM
Dave, can you explain away the no bacon on Fridays during Lent? Because if you can, I will love you forever.

Being a Catholic myself, and going through 8 years of Catholic Elementary school... To answer your question. I don't know.

I can't think of a Friday this Lent that I haven't eaten meat. And I've only been to church once since Christmas. I may not be the best example of a Catholic.

I'll tell you what I'll do...I'll email my friend who went to seminary. He'll know. Post more soon................

Kit's Alter Ego
April 7, 2004, 11:20 AM
and going through 8 years of Catholic Elementary school...

Did you get held back?

--Kit

CoreyBrown
April 7, 2004, 12:07 PM
He couldnt count so he couldnt do his hail marys. That is like a final exam.

Dave Ries
April 7, 2004, 12:13 PM
7th and 8th Grade included. So I guess it was a Catholic Elemantary/Jr. High school.

I didn't get held back...I just obviously never paid attention. A.D.D. can do that to ya.

Kit's Alter Ego
April 7, 2004, 12:19 PM
For me, the problem was D.A.R.E.

--Kit

PT
April 7, 2004, 01:59 PM
Wow, okay I think Im getting the handle of this Jewish, Catholic religion thing. Yet I have one more question, than I'll be done with it.

Is there a way we can start our own religion, maybe something like mixing the jewish religion with the Catholic? I think that would be awesome! Two worlds, become one!

If not, can we just have a party where we serve Dave's Grilled Cheese, Latka's, and a lot of pork! I say we do this at Moser's, whattya think?!

ilaughatme
April 7, 2004, 03:06 PM
Well, PT, technically the Catholics come from the Jews because Catholics were the first Christians.

EthanK
April 7, 2004, 03:11 PM
Ah, but what about the Gnostics? Those who were exterminated by the Catholics for claiming to have hidden knowledge of Jesus's teachings? They grew up at the same time and place as the Catholics, just didn't get the same press. Then historic revisionism took hold and all mentions of Gnosticism were erased from record until the Nag Hammadi papayri were discovered in Egypt in the 1940's.

Although I guess you're right, only Catholics should count just because you don't often see the Gnostics around any more.


ok, I'm a total dork

CohenFridge
April 7, 2004, 03:15 PM
As a DSI Jew who has not yet partaken in this discussion...

I'm following Passover this year...at least, as best as I can in the University. I feel like it's the thought that counts.

There are a lot of crazy rules that the Orthodox (heavy metal jews) peoples impose, like, no high-fructose corn syrup (apparently corn can ferment, thus it can rise like yeast...thus...it is not kosher for passover...or as i like to say, "K for P.")

I am a Conservative (classic rock jew) which means I don't go as crazy for these rules as the Orthodox peoples do, but I still wear my yarmulka (or kippa...or skullcap) in Synogogue and follow some of the rules. I don't keep Kosher but my dad did...my mom actually converted to Judaism before my parents got married...since Judaism is a matralinial (sp?) religion...technically I'm not jewish, but it was a jewish womb perhaps? I do try to keep Kosher for passover because I don't practice Judaism during the year that much and I really do believe some of the things that are set forth in it. I think that not eating real bread for 8 days, is a fine send off to the Jews who got out of Egypt after being in bondage for a long time.

I am slipping a bit into Reform Judaism (um...maybe this is grunge judaism?) where there aren't a lot of rules that are followed, lots of stuff is optional. I wouldn't say the Reform jews are lazy, but they do try to encorporate a lot of American stuff into their "curriculum." There are also Reconstructionist Jews (I guess these could be hippie flower power jews) and Jews for Jesus (who I don't really consider Jews...but I guess we could call them musicians who go up to the stage and don't play any music).

I've thought a lot about my faith over the years, and I definitely believe in G-d (see!) and feel as though some Jewish tenants should be upheld. Like not spelling out the big guy's name. People think it's weird...but I don't ever feel comfortable writing His name out.

I joke about my religion a lot, but I really do think that it should be taken seriously at some level.

And there we go...I'll try the grilled cheese recipes after Passover is done.

Sweet Ass,
Bryan

Jeff Sconce
April 7, 2004, 03:17 PM
Hey! I've got a peachy idea!
Let's combine the idea of Pageant shows with our sundry religions!
Different religion affiliated groups will have a pageant, with humerous renderings of important events in the history or mythology of their faith. The best performers win the universe!
Being an athiest, and therefore hating all religions equally, I could be a judge. This could be hella cool!
(If only there were a bunch of DSI Hindu folk...maybe the Hare Krishnas would play along?)

Kit's Alter Ego
April 7, 2004, 04:12 PM
There are a lot of crazy rules that the Orthodox (heavy metal jews) peoples impose, like, no high-fructose corn syrup (apparently corn can ferment, thus it can rise like yeast...thus...it is not kosher for passover...or as i like to say, "K for P.")

I kept reading this as:
Thus...it is not kosher for passover to use letters, like, say, "K" or "P."

--Kit

Kit's Alter Ego
April 7, 2004, 04:14 PM
(...maybe the Hare Krishnas would play along?)

They'd certainly include the most music.

--Kit

PT
April 7, 2004, 08:48 PM
Okay, so I've started a new religion, its based on Edward Miller's Theory that we humans stopped evolving in 1954. So I went to my mothers church today and asked if I could hold weekly meetings on Sat at 5pm. Father Andrew said, qoute "Let me ask God........yeah its okay".

So basically the religion focuses on a God, yet we will not call it God, we shall call it, "Universe". Our main focus is to give people the idea that everything is going to end. We must prepare for the end, and thats what this religion focuses on. The Romans believed that when they died, they simply stopped existing, "End Sleep". Statistics and research show that more Romans commited suicide throughout thier riegn than any other human civilization! !

I dont want you to commit suicide, but in my new religion, Universe would prefere you do so now, than waiting til you get old.

Lettme know what ya think!

PT

Lisa P
April 7, 2004, 09:09 PM
You know, there is really only one more Friday left. I can do without the bacon. Let me know how that whole thing works out for you, PT.

PT
April 7, 2004, 10:42 PM
Lisa, I know you want in on this, Im bringing a kegger!

Zack Bly
April 8, 2004, 07:54 AM
There are a lot of crazy rules that the Orthodox (heavy metal jews) peoples impose....

I am a Conservative (classic rock jew) which means I don't go as crazy for these rules....

I am slipping a bit into Reform Judaism (um...maybe this is grunge judaism?) where there aren't a lot of rules that are followed....are also Reconstructionist Jews (I guess these could be hippie flower power jews) and Jews for Jesus (who I don't really consider Jews...but I guess we could call them musicians who go up to the stage and don't play any music).

i love this metaphor so much.

maybe reform jews are like prog rock jews?