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Kit's Alter Ego
March 4, 2004, 02:18 PM
Because I can't even remember where I post all these parodies, I'm going to start a thread to keep track of them. If you write a parody, please post it here. Everybody loves a parody.

--Kit

Kit's Alter Ego
March 4, 2004, 02:28 PM
"DSIdentity" (a combo parody of the movie Identity and 24LIVE)
http://dirtysouthimprov.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=189&highlight=#189

"The Weather, It's Wetter" (to the tune of Shakira's "Whenever Wherever")
http://dirtysouthimprov.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=413

"Ethan-Corey: Pic Observers" (to the tune of the TMNT Cartoon Theme Song)
http://dirtysouthimprov.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=2733&highlight=#2733

(This next is a repost only because I'm not sure what will happen to the DSIF4 Forum in the near future.)

"Captain Morgan" (to the tune of the Captain Planet Cartoon Theme Song)
http://www.toymuseum.com/inside/c01/3265036.gifTequila
Vodka
Gin
Rum
Burbon

Chasers.

By your powers combined, I am Captaaaaaaaaain Morgan!

Captain Morgan,
He's our hero!
Let's reduce sobriety to zero!
While we're coming through the snow,
Inebriation's the way to go!

Captain Morgan--no exception--
Gonna take away our depth perception!
Gonna taste good, calm our shivers.
After all, who really needs a liver?

Eighty-Year-Old Life-Long Alcoholic and Her Lawyer: You'll pay for this, Captain Morgan!

< shouted, not sung >
We've had plenty beers...
We've had more than you!
We're so absinthe-minded that we dropped our booze!
Temperance and fruit juice
Are not the way;
Hear what Captain Morgan has to say:

Captain Morgan: Got a little Captain in you?


--Kit

Kit's Alter Ego
March 4, 2004, 03:53 PM
"Bat" (To the tune of "Bad" by Michael Jackson)

This festival...
Has gone all right.
We've made our way
To the last night.
I need all the...
Instructors out.
Gonna show these kids
What improv's about.

Turn Off...Turn Off...
PleaseTurnOffAll...The lights...

Now that it's dark
We'll do our share
We'll make you laugh
While we sit in chairs.
I'm telling you
Just watch your mouth.
This game is ours
At Dirty South.

Bridge
Well, we'll give you scenes and sound-offs...
And amusing anecdotes.
Well, my friend, it's really lucky
We didn't get sore throats . . .

Before The Bat, The Bat -
Come On
(Hearing, Hearing Bat)
We do The Bat, The Bat-
You Know It
(Hearing, Hearing Bat)
We do The Bat, The Bat-
Hey don't, you see?
(Hearing, Hearing Bat)
And the audience is begging for us to perform it once again: The Bat . . .

The word is all;
Can't make 'em see.
Hafta just describe
Our surroundings.
"Imagine this"
"No talking please,"
And "Listen Up"
Are our only pleas.
But don't stifle laughs;
They're great because...
Performance arts
Still need applause.

Bridge
Well, I know it's way past midnight
And the darkness is complete.
And your Red Bull buzz is fading...
But please don't fall asleep . . .

During The Bat, The Bat -
Come On
(Hearing, Hearing Bat)
We do The Bat, The Bat-
You Know It
(Hearing, Hearing Bat)
We do The Bat, The Bat-
You know how...it goes:
Start with sound effects, go through sev'ral scenes,
just to come full-circle. That's... The Bat . . .

< sounds of dancing >
< sounds of fighting >
< sounds of West Side Story >
< all break into chorus of "I Feel Pretty" before falling back into "Bad" >

Bridge
We can forge a world of wonder.
We can take you all on tour.
But our eyes can't keep adjustin'
Stop opening the door . . .

During The Bat, The Bat -
Come On
(Hearing, Hearing Bat)
We do The Bat, The Bat-
You Know It
(Hearing, Hearing Bat)
We do The Bat, The Bat-
Now I'll grab...my crotch
(Hearing, Hearing Bat)
Woo! Woo! Woo!
And don't try to leave now during the show;
Shoulda gone before you came . . .

Besides, it's cooooool, The Bat -
Come On
(Hearing, Hearing Bat)
We do The Bat, The Bat-
You Know It
(Hearing, Hearing Bat)
We do The Bat, The Bat-
It's more than...it looks.
And we might be making out up on stage
But you'll never get to know . . . The Bat.


--Kit

PS: :shock: THEY'VE DILATED! NOOOOOOO! :shock:
PS: My eyes, not my pupils.

Kit's Alter Ego
March 29, 2004, 12:22 PM
"Fraggle Rock"
sung by John Elton
(ttto Elton John's "Crocodile Rock")

I remember a time way back
When Jim Henson was real high-tech:
The Dark Crystal, The Muppet Show,
Back before they created Tickle-Me Elmo.
But the one that really hit the spot,
Yeah the show that was tot'lly hot:
Turn on the TV at 3 o'clock,
And hear the theme song tell you, "Come to Fraggle Rock!" Well...

Fraggle Rockin'
It's Muppets talkin'
They've got felt instead of skin.
The only place where callin' people Boober
Isn't sexual harassment.
Ohh! Doozers buildin'
Their towers tall.
The Fraggles, they will eat them all! And well-a...
Fraggle Rock, it's hiding right behi-ind your
Wa-wa-wa-wa-wawall.

Laaaaa, lalalala laaaaa.
Lalalala laaaaaa.
Lalalala laaaaaa.

When the real world's weird, as often is the case,
Uncle Matt sends postcards back from Outer Space.
Trouble's brewing. What'll we do next?
Let's ask the Trash Heap wearing horn-rimmed specs.
Then we'll go up to the gadget shop,
Hide when Sprocket is warning Doc,
Then we'll steal his useless stock,
And we'll use it to party down at Fraggle Rock. Well...

Fraggle Rockin'
It's Muppets talkin'
They've got felt instead of skin.
But now the reruns aren't on any channel,
Even Nickelodeon!
Hey! Come to my place;
They're all on tape!
Whoops, they're on Beta...my mistake. But, well-a...
Fraggle Rock, it's the best show they ever did
ma-ake, ma-ake, ma-ake!

Laaaaa, lalalala laaaaa.
Lalalala laaaaaa.
Lalalala laaaaaa.
(Everybody join in!)
< a cappella >
Laaaaa, lalalala laaaaa.
Lalalala laaaaaa.
Lalalala laaaaaa
< switch to Fraggle Rock theme song >
Lala lala LA lalala...
Lala la la la!
Dance your cares away!
Worries for another day!
Let the music play,
Come to Fraggle Rock!
< clap clap >
Come to Fraggle Rock!
< clap clap >
Boober: Come to Fraggle Rock.
< end note: >
Buh!


--Kit

PS: This is best sung while wearing red swim goggles decorated with green feathers.
PPS: ttto = "To The Tune Of"

Kit's Alter Ego
June 20, 2004, 05:50 PM
"Sticky Sticky"
sung by Lum Bego
(ttto Lou Bega's "Tricky Tricky")

She likes Mars. She likes Riesens too.
She likes Starbursts; they act like glue.
She drinks Kool-Aid...gets a purple grin...
Then gets her gum in my hair again.
She'll pull you right in, then you can't get out
'Cause she's covered...in taffy, fudge and Mounds.
She's all gooey, yeah, both her hands and mouth.
Stuck on her? < grunts and can't break free > I am, no doubt.

She has a ton of choc'late bars
Gobs of Mallomars
Car'mel is all that she eats.
And ev'ry day, she's lookin' for
A man to give her S'Mores
And pay for all her sweets.

She's a short-stacker-syrup backer.
She'll nosh on honey crackers
Rib-attacker, heavy snacker.
She is a lip smacker!

Sticky sticky!
She is real sticky sticky!
She is so sticky sticky!
It makes me sicky sicky!
That damn goo.
Hwaaa!

< mambo >
1, 2, 3-4-5
5, 6, 7-8
1, 2, 3-4-5
5, 6, 7-8
1, 2, 3-4-5
5, 6, 7-8
1, 2, 3-4-5
5, 6...

I like holidays...when there's candy. That's true.
We used to eat so much that our stomachs grew.
My girl and I, ...we could barely stand,
But afterwards...I'd go and wash my hands!

She runs her fingers through my hair
Then it starts to tear
Stickin' to her hands < pull free with a grunt >
It's worse than Nair.
There's no accounting for taste
Man, it's such a waste
She clings worse than paste...
With haste!

She put the 'gel' in 'jelly-bean'
And her haute cuisine
Consists of a P-B-and-J.
Like clockwork tells her 'Charming Prince'
To buy her Junior Mints...
Won't let me skip a day!

She eats Cry-Babies, gobbles pralines
And butterscotch maybe
Sugerbabies, Little Debbie's,
She is a tar baby.

Peeps plucker, health-food chucker.
And candy-corn shucker.
Jam from Smuckers, then she puckers...
Guess I'm her love sucker.

Sticky sticky!
She is real sticky sticky!
She is so sticky sticky!
It makes me sicky sicky!
That damn goo.
Hwaaa!
A little bit of sugarcane in my life.
A little bit of Burger King by my side.
A little bit of Reeses, what I need.
A little bit of bisque is all I see.
A little bit of ice cream in the sun.
A little bit of icing all night long.
A little bit of barbecue, here I am.
That little bit of goo is marzipan!

Sticky sticky!
(Sticky sticky!)
It's kinda icky icky!
(Icky icky!)
She is so sticky sticky!
(Sticky sticky!)
It makes me sicky sicky!
Eeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuwwwww...

She's a short-stacker-syrup backer.
She'll nosh on honey crackers
Rib-attacker, heavy snacker.
She is a lip smacker!

Jawbreakers, grits from Quakers,
And she's a cheese-caker.
Brownie baker, Gummi-Snaker...
Don't try to handshake her!

Sticky sticky!
She is real sticky sticky!
She is so sticky sticky!
It makes me sicky sicky!
That damn goo.
Huuuueeeeeeeeeggggggggghhhhh!

--Kit

PS: Lyrics to "The Space Props Detective" are as follows:












End Lyrics.

Anonymous
June 21, 2004, 11:39 AM
Brilliant! Thanks for posting these here.

Zack Bly
June 22, 2004, 02:14 PM
"TAILS" (to the tune of "Hey Ya" by Andre 3000)

(VERSE 1) Ro-botnik don't mess around
he's turning furry animals to robot foes/
What's worse, his Death-Egg fortress
makes him nigh-invincible, oh woe of woes!/
He's got eleven zones chock full of spikes,
collapsing floors and laser guns/
Thank God that Sonic's got a friend
in high pla-ces to put him on the run!//
(HOOK) Ta-ils! (ring collecting noise) Ta-ils! (x4)//
(VERSE 2) They call him "Tails," yeah, they call him "Tails"/
His friends all call him "Tails" when he waves them behind!/
And he can spin dash, just like his pal Sonic/
Yeah he can do a spin dash that would blow y'-all's minds!/
They always told him, "Tails, you're too slow!"/
But this fox / But this fox / but this fox / but this fox / HUH!!
But this fox he sure holds his own/
A Fly-a fly-a, He's a fly-a fly-a/
And he sure comes in handy when you're in the Special Zone//
(HOOK) // (AD LIBS) Don't have to ask a psychic, you're just my fuzzy sidekick / Can't wait, I'm in a hurry / my feet are getting blurry/ I'm, I'm, I'm just being honest, I'm just being honest! //
(CALL RESPONSE) (Sonic Team) Alright now Sonic! Now, how many heads are better than one? / (two "bloop" noises*) / I can't year you! I said, how many heads are better than one? / (the "continue" noise) / Casino Night Casino Night Casino Night Casino Night Alright now Tails! / ("bloop" noise*) Now I'm gonna blow up this Death Egg in just a few seconds! / Now don't have me beat this Zone for nothing! / I want you to take me down to Earth! / Catch me in midair! / You are my sidekick, ahhh! / Here we go now // (BREAKDOWN) Take off, take, takeoff, takeoff, take, takeoff, takeoff, take, takeoff / take off in a little red biplane! /
(AD LIBS) Now all Buzz Bombers, and robot chickens, and octopi, your time has come! / We're comin' after you! Comin' after you! Comin' after you! / (HOOK) (OUT)

* (this "bloop" noise is the noise that Sonic and/or Tails makes when you jump/super spin attack in the game)

Kit's Alter Ego
July 27, 2004, 01:45 AM
"Peanut Buttercup" (ttto "Build Me Up Buttercup"):
http://dirtysouthimprov.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=9701&highlight=#9701

"I'm Your Genus" by Benjamin Anorahma
(ttto "I'm Your Venus" by Bananarama)

Reflected in the countertop:
Beauty that goes way past words.
I've asked you twelve times for one date,
But you think I'm a nerd!

You've got it!
You tell me I'm not it!
But, I'm your genus,
I'm your phylum...
Why aren't you smilin?
< repeat last 3 lines >

You always take me for gran*ted*.
Baby, hey, I don't come free.
I may be just a Bio TA,
But there's tax on-a me!
(he he ha ha ha ha)

You're tender!
And the opposite gender!
I'm your genus,
I'm your phylum...
Why aren't you smilin'?
< repeat last 3 lines >

< rapping: >
I was meant to be
With this girl, you see.
If you need more proof, better look at the
Scientific name;
We're both the same
( Genus! )
And I used to think that I had it made
'Cause she'd suck up to me for a better grade,
But I don't know why
She won't touch my...
( Venus! )

You're zoomin'!
Oh, baby, you're human!
I'm your genus,
I'm your phylum...
Why aren't you smilin'?
< repeat last 3 lines >

You're lab drawer's in perfect *order*!
And you hate Elvis, just like me.
And just 'cause you call the *King dumb*,
We'll start a *family*!
(Yeah!!!)

You're high class!
Oh, baby, you're *my class*!
Well, I'm your genus,
I'm your phylum...
Why aren't you smilin'?
< repeat last 3 lines >

(You think I'm a nerd!)

Yeah, baby, you're human!
And, baby, I'm human!
We ain't nothin' but mammals!
Yeah, baby, you're human!
And, baby, I'm human!
We're both the same species!
< fade out >

--Kit

Kit's Alter Ego
August 17, 2004, 04:46 PM
"Titanic Proportions" by Billeonardo Joel
(ttto "You May Be Right" by Billy Joel)

Friday night, my heart was reeling
Saturday, I got the feeling
That Sunday night, we'd sink into the sea-ea.
If we're star-crossed lovers too,
Then there's nothing we can do;
One of us will die, and I'm pretty sure it's me-e.

If I told you I'm rich, I'd be lying
On the bow, you said, "Hey, Jack, I'm flying!"
We're lucky that you didn't flip the rail.
I said, "Just be who you are!"
Then we Steamed! Up! That! Old! Car!
Now an iceberg's ripped the ship, and we must bai-ai-ail!

You may be right;
This may be doomsday.
But I won my ticket in a poker game, and free is free.
Turn down the lights,
Pose...freely for me.
'Cause I can draw
Folks in the raw
No sittin' fee!

< 4-measure instrumental >

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell...
I got handcuffed to a pole down there.
You saved me and messed up your hair.
We were shot at by your boyfriend, Billy Zaaaaane.
Then you told me that I'm nice,
But by then I'd turned to ice,
But at least I wasn't feeling any pai-ain.

Well, the years go by, and you smile at the
Huge gem you tossed into the sea
Just after telling your survivor's knowledge...
Well now, Rose, hey, shame on you!
'Cause the least that you could do
Was go pawn it to pay for your daughter's co-o-o-llege!

You may be right;
Our love is over.
But the Heart...of The Ocean's still worth lots of dough.
Our theme song says:
"My heart will go on..."
For all I know, you may be right
Celine Dion.

< instrumental where singer kisses old woman for a long time >

You may be right;
This may be doomsday,
But I won my ticket in a poker game, and free is free!
Our theme song says,
"My heart will go on..."
For all I know, you may be right
Celine Dion.

You may be right, Ce-Celine Dio-on.
You may be right, Ce-Celine Dio-on. (Celine Dion!)
Leo DiCaprio, Celine Dio-on! (Celine Dion!)
Leo DiCaprio, Celine! (And Kate! Wins! Let!)
Leo DiCaprio, Celine! (And Kate! Wins! Let!)

< fade >

--Kit

Kit's Alter Ego
February 15, 2005, 01:01 PM
Lupercalifragilefeelinexrecallingnauseous
(ttto "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious" from Mary Poppins)
http://dirtysouthimprov.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?p=23041#23041

--Kit

Jeff Sconce
February 16, 2005, 12:50 AM
I am both proud of and horrified by this thread.

PT
February 16, 2005, 01:57 AM
Hey, at least it's being used for something.